“What’s the best way to describe how you’re feeling right now?” “Do you remember when exactly you felt the urge to hurt yourself?” “Have you been stressed by anything lately? Was it one event or a combination of factors?”
“Thank you for bringing up your boundaries. We can talk about something else. " “That’s cool with me if this subject’s off-limits. What would you like to do instead?” “I respect your need for privacy. I really appreciate you being honest with me. "
Once she’s finished, validate their experience with a comment like, “That sounds incredibly challenging. ” Then, thank them for all their honesty and vulnerability. For example, say, “I feel honored that you can share this with me. ” Follow up with them and give her more opportunities to talk. Reach out with something like, “Just checking in. How are you right now?”
“Would a fun distraction help?” “Do you want to just vent?” “How would it feel to be held right now?” “Could you use some company? I’m free. ”
If she’s in the US, she can call S. A. F. E Alternatives at 1-800-366-8288. If she’s in the UK, she can call Mind Infoline at 0300 123 3393. If she’s in Canada, she can call Crisis Text Line at 1-800-668-6868. If she’s in Australia, she can call Lifeline at 13 11 14. If she’s in India, she can call Helpline at 1860 2662 345 or 1800 2333 330.
Trained staff will be able to assess how much of a risk they are to themselves. They’ll also be able to refer them to additional resources, like therapists and support groups. They can continue to go to maintain a sense of stability and talk about a treatment plan.
If they’re angry, they can let off steam by hitting a pillow, ripping paper, or crushing a can. If they’re sad, they can call up a friend, scream into a pillow, or cry as they play some music. If they’re on edge, they can snap rubber bands, jog, or try out yoga. If they’re numb, they can dunk their hand in cold water or clap their hands.
Tell them why they’re important to you and how much you’re glad they’re in your life. Focus on any special talents or skills of theirs. Help them come up with “mantras,” or hopeful and kind phrases they can repeat. They can say something like, “I am always worthy of love and respect. ”
Art helps balance their emotional and psychological wellness because it gives them an outlet. Once they release anger, sadness, or frustration, their mood is likely to improve. The two of you can also bond as they share their projects and explains what inspired them.
A goal set with their therapist might sound like, “I will journal every time I get overwhelmed and talk about what I wrote down in my sessions. ” An academic ambition can be something like, “I will attend more tutoring sessions so I can get the best grade possible in my Economics class. ” A vision for their career may sound like, “I really want to make use of all my empathy and become a social worker. I’ll need to model good habits for the families I serve. ” If your partner has anxiety, talking about the future might make them more anxious, so be careful.
Remind them that any kind of vigorous exercise can help them let go of a lot of anger. Encourage them to try group workouts so they can expand their social circle. Point out relaxing activities, too, like yoga or Pilates.
Staying on the topic of safety and prevention of self-harm is more likely to motivate them. Ask what was the biggest factor in helping them quit self harming: it may have been for themselves, for others, or to prepare for a significant new chapter, like moving to a new school. [15] X Research source Once they’ve shared their motivation, make sure to keep bringing it up to them.