Perched comfortably on the stage of New York’s Cooper Union, Lewinsky laughs and cries, gushes and parries, fielding questions about her ordeal from a mostly friendly audience. She has rarely sounded more sympathetic (an impression enhanced by adroit juxtaposition with the hysterical TV footage of the day) and many of her observations hit their mark. Why, she wants to know, was Paula Jones’s right to a trial more important than her right to privacy? But still, the maddening contradictions persist. “I didn’t choose to become a public person,” she says at the outset. “I would do anything to have my anonymity back.” Lewinsky’s lament about unwanted celebrity seems entirely heart-felt-at least until someone points out that, if that’s the case, “why are you doing this?” Lewinsky’s explanation is that, because her immunity deal didn’t expire until last year, there were things she couldn’t talk about before (like what she really thinks of Ken Starr.) Maybe so, but one can’t help but wonder that a part of Lewinksy-who was paid for her participation by HBO-always craved the spotlight after all.
As a reporter who lived the story, I was struck by a few points. First, just how clear-headed Lewinsky really was during that crazed first day of the crisis. It was Jan. 16, 1998 and Lewinsky had just been confronted at the Ritz Carlton Hotel by Starr’s prosecutors who threatened her with criminal prosecution (and 27 years in jail) if she didn’t agree to wear a wire and entrap the president. Lewinsky breaks down as she retells the story. “I thought I was going to die,” she sobs. It is the emotional high point of the film. And yet, incredibly, she was entirely focused the whole time on one thing: protecting Bill Clinton. “All I could think about was the president’s deposition (in the Paula Jones case) the next morning,” she recalls. At one point, she even ducks out to the bathroom and tries to call Clinton’s secretary, Betty Currie. When that fails, she considered approaching an utter stranger pushing a baby stroller and pleading with her to call the White House. (Imagine that conversation!) Starr’s men didn’t have a clue but their entire investigative strategy-using Monica to get Bill-never had a prayer.
The second point, is just how shabbily she was later treated by Clinton and the White House. After the story breaks, Lewinsky was trashed as a stalker and a slut. The attacks, the film makes clear, came directly from the Oval Office. How elevating to watch again Sidney Blumental’s deposition in which he describes Clinton telling him how Monica came on to him but that he rebuffed her. The right wing rallied behind Starr and Linda Tripp; Democrats embraced Clinton. But “there wasn’t really a political party that wanted to be affiliated with me,” says Lewinsky. There is, to be sure, a sense of victimhood in all this and Monica still has trouble accepting much responsibility for her fate. So it is no surprise when at least one hostile questioner stands up and says he is tired of her “self-serving drivel.” Lewinsky pauses for a while and responds, quite gently: “Why did you come today?” For the same self revealing reasons, no doubt, that millions are likely to be watching on Sunday.
