Published on Reddit’s r/AmITheA****** forum, a woman under the anonymous username u/F54tughi556 shared her story in order to receive the opinions of the “AITA” community. the viral post has over 13,000 upvotes and 6,000 comments.

The original poster (OP) began her story by explaining how much her daughter likes to bake. She enjoys baking cakes and occasional sweets and makes some money by selling her baked goods to family and friends.

For his 45th birthday, OP’s daughter’s stepfather asked her to bake him a cake, to which she agreed. OP encouraged her husband to pay her and he refused since she was his daughter. However, she kept insisting that he should pay her since their daughter is a “people pleaser” and eventually gave in. After a few days went by, he never paid her daughter.

She wrote, “I decided to go ahead and sell the wrist watch I bought him as his birthday cake and pay her for her. He [found] out and went off on me. I told him he had [enough] time and shouldve paid her seven before he [received] the cake. He said that I was teaching her to treat familial relationship as ’transactional’ and [raising] her to be ‘materialistic.’

“I explained the time, effort and even money she put towards making the cake but he lashed out verbally calling me an a****** for making this move and for enabling my daughter to expect so much from family that she’s supposed to help with nothing in return,” she continued.

She explained that her daughter expected to be paid, and that’s why she confronted her husband. When she returned the inexpensive watch she gave her daughter money for the ingredients and kept the rest.

Newsweek reached out to u/F54tughi556 for comment.

Newsweek has published several articles regarding family conflict including a woman telling her sister-in-law she “had it coming” when she faced her divorce, a woman who didn’t want to spend every other Christmas at home with her close family and a woman who was “so angry” with her stepson’s overstayed his welcome.

An expert’s thoughts on OP’s situation

“It sounds like mom assumed that dad should ‘pay’ for his daughter making him a birthday cake by giving up his gift. This is a huge assumption, and the situation didn’t really involve the mom at all,” Martha Teater, a licensed marriage and family counselor, told Newsweek.

Teater also discussed what she would say to a client going through a similar situation. She explained that she would ask the mother why she felt the need to get in the middle of the conflict. She would express that if the daughter had a problem about not being paid, she should speak to her stepdad herself.

Redditor reactions

U/FunkyOrangePenguin received the top comment of over 28,000 upvotes, “I find it strange that you’d make him pay for his own birthday cake rather than pay for it yourself. Who asks someone to pay for their own birthday cake? [You’re the a******].”

U/1962Michael pointed out, “As his wife it would be normal that YOU provide the birthday cake, whether you make it yourself or buy one at the local bakery. So if YOU wanted your daughter to make your husband a cake, AND you wanted her to be paid for her work, then YOU should have paid her to begin with. [You’re the a******].”

“[You’re the a******], she can’t afford to make her dad a birthday cake, or you couldn’t pay her? It’s his birthday for God’s sake. You sound petty,” u/Not-nuts said.

“[You’re the a******] You should have paid for the cake, not him. It’s his birthday. The fact you intentionally ruined his birthday by returning the thing he wanted makes you double [a******],” u/K14-Deploy commented.